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Patty Kimerer

Leave Han Solo — ahem, Harrison Ford — alone

Well, it’s been another week of wacky here on planet Earth. California beaches were opened for 47 seconds before rule-breakers cramming the sands — and each other at a social distance of about .5 mm — ruined it for everyone. Nimrods. Continuing controversy and drama surrounding the ...

Staying home all day, every day rocks — said no one ever

Oh my gosh, I absolutely LOVE being home all the time, every single day, 24/7. It’s nothing short of awesome, being confined to the house for work, play and every other imaginable human action. Toss in the total fabulosity known as the daily (I’m sorry, not daily, hourly; no, wait, ...

It’s finally time to get back to reality … reality TV, that is

I missed them. I didn’t think I would, but I did. Well, I knew I’d miss Erika. She’s wicked cool, after all. But the rest of them, I didn’t really plan on pining after. Except the big B. Sure, I knew I’d be reeling from Bethenny withdrawals. She’s my favorite of all of them, BT ...

On this silent night, all was quiet and calm

Most people don’t know this. Actually, I’m not sure anyone does — or they didn’t until now. I’m a bit of an insomniac. That’s not the secret part. My poor sleep pattern is near legendary among my circle of humans, by the by. No, the previously undisclosed info is that quite often ...

Quarantine makes for one slightly crabby Patty

Well, the global Groundhog Day scenario continues, eh? Hmpf. I feel you, friends. And yep, there’s no denying it: Our current sitch here on the third rock is scaring the stuffings out of old PK. Period. So I feel the need to again remind everyone of the CDC COVID-19 Guidelines for ...

Low-maintenance girls are quarantine queens

You know, now is when it finally pays off to be me. Oh, I know, I’m a dork by all estimations and of fairly considerable percentage. I don’t carry designer bags. I buy formal dresswear exclusively from the clearance bin. On the rare occasion you see nail polish on these man hands of ...

Working from home is a sacrifice we can all enjoy

We’re not talking about it. Okay, we technically are. But I’m not mentioning IT, specifically. Well, not by name, expressly. This week, anyway. Not because I’m not taking it seriously. I am. Boy, am I. It’s not because I’m not scared. I am. Man, am I. It’s not that I don’t ...

We’ll get through this together, at a distance

You probably haven’t heard much about it yet in your area. It’s a new thing, really. Just burst onto the scene about back in ... oh, late December, I believe. Nah, I’m not referring to the whole deal with the super-jolly dude in red flying around on his big old sleigh with his cool ...

Pop was always there and will always be remembered

Fernando. Fred. Freddie. Hon. Dad. Foh-pa. Bop. Grandpa Marinucci. Honorary big brother. Mr. Marinucci. Marinuch. My father was called many different names by a myriad of folks. As for me? I called him Pop. I was pretty much the only one who referred to him that way. I think that’s ...

Don’t worry about what you hear; you know you

It all happened so quickly. It was over nearly before it started. “Are we the only ones in here?” I faintly heard one gal ask another from my stall at the far wall end of the ladies room. “I think so,” came the somewhat muted reply as I tried to whip up a sham sneeze in attempts to ...