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Patty Kimerer

My unbiased opinion on conflicting communiques

I saw this Hyundai commercial the other day that challenges Americans (and probs all the other residents of the third rock where Hyundais are sold) to “Question Everything.” It’s a full minute of film, TV, music and sports celebrities driving in, lying next to, loading the back hatch of ...

Ditch silly talk for loaded baked potatoes

So I was chatting with my girlfriend the other day. And, for the sake of protecting the innocent (she, being my gal pal), I’ll refer to her as, um, Barbara Jean. As Barbara Jean and I engaged in one of our daily breakdown sessions, she happened to mention the off-putting exchange she ...

Cleanliness on campus next to — impossible

Well, it’s about time I came clean. I mean, as clean as possible under the circumstances. Oh, no, it’s got nothing to do with quarantine or lockdown or limited access to cleaning supplies or anything like that. I mean to say, that’s not the dirty little secret I’m keeping. What I am ...

Cinderella gets popular vote by a slipper

To mask or not to mask ... that is the question To be clear, it’s the question I’m sick of hearing, asking, wondering, contemplating, debating and basically just philosophizing over incessantly. Please understand, I continue to take this icky old pandemic thing seriously. Probably more ...

Reminiscing about Pop … and Carmel

I heard the craziest thing the other day. Someone told me a local company was offering potential staffers an extra $2 an hour “bonus” simply to (A) accept the position and (B) once hired, work their full, regular old standard, run-of-the-mill 40-hour work weeks consistently. Meaning, er, ...

Who’s best of the best? Why mom, of course

I am one lucky gal. First — and of most significant wowzer factor— I am the mom of the world’s most fabulous human. Seriously. No offense to the other Homo sapiens or anything. It’s just that for some reason, and through no particular worthiness on my part, I have been blessed with ...