Things had been slow around the farm. “You’re always slow,” Cousin Ollie chided. I glared. But Ollie didn’t notice since he was jumping three or four paces ahead of me, as usual. “I don’t run unless a bear’s chasing me. And since there aren’t any bears in our ...

Until I was married, I didn’t know when I was wrong. I needed someone in my life to tell me what to do. To tell me if that shirt goes with those pants. To inform me of what foods I like and which I despise. (I still think she had it backward when it came to beets and Boston cream doughnuts. ...

I froze when I pulled the card out of the mailbox. It was from my sister-in-law, the one famous for packing greeting cards with a fiesta of tiny, shimmering confetti. Open the card without precautions and a shower of shiny cutouts of party hats, streamers and noisemakers, and silhouettes of ...

The guy in the electronics department asked what sounded like an impertinent question: “Do you want a mouse with a dongle or without?” “Excuse me?” “Your wireless mouse, do you want one with a dongle or are you using WiFi?” I still find it odd that we call the little slidey ...

Learn, young grasshoppers, from the wisdom of an old widower: The reason communication can be so difficult in marriage is that while we use the same words, we speak different languages. I learned this many decades ago when I had the morning off, didn’t feel like cooking and had no money. I ...

It seems like a guy can’t even buy a hamburger without getting a side of surveys. I ran into a store for a box of tissues and a birthday card. A few minutes later, a survey popped up in my email: “Please tell us about your shopping experience.” Pick up a prescription and get handed a ...