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For most families, conversations about death, aging, funeral planning, probate, hospice care and end-of-life wishes are often postponed until circumstances force them to be addressed.
A recent community event in Boardman sought to change that by creating a comfortable setting where people could ask difficult questions before they find themselves facing a crisis. Davis Becker Funeral Home hosted "Dying to Know," a free community open house that brought together professionals from a wide range of fields connected to aging, caregiving and end-of-life planning.
Representatives from probate court, estate planning, hospice care, veterans services, senior care, clergy, grief support, funeral services and local businesses were available for one-on-one conversations, followed by a community question-and-answer panel.
The event, which drew dozens of people, was designed to give families access to information they may someday need but often do not know where to find. Organizers said the goal was education rather than sales, helping people understand available resources and encouraging discussions that many families avoid.
A common theme emerged from nearly every participant and attendee interviewed during the event: death remains a taboo subject, despite being something every family will eventually face. Organizers said breaking that silence can reduce confusion, stress and unnecessary hardship when a loved one dies.
PERSONAL EXPERIENCE SPARKS IDEA
The idea for the event grew from the personal experiences of funeral directors Dawn Heldreth and Susan Pruden, who both found themselves navigating complicated family losses.
Heldreth, an aftercare and pre-need lead advisor and licensed funeral director, said she frequently encounters families who have questions about funeral planning and loss, but often do not know where to turn.
"Dying to Know started with something I see every day, people who have questions about dying, funeral planning and what happens when we lose someone," Heldreth said. "We prepare ourselves for the good things in life -- weddings, babies, retirement -- but often we fail to prepare for the one thing that we will all face, death."
Her perspective was shaped by the sudden death of her father nearly two decades ago.
"The sudden loss of my dad made me see firsthand that you can avoid the conversation, but you can't avoid death," she said. "Our lack of conversation left me making all of the decisions while grieving."
Heldreth said that experience ultimately led her into the funeral profession and inspired a mission to help other families avoid the same uncertainty.
She described the event as a safe place where people could ask questions without embarrassment and begin discussing final wishes with loved ones.
"The conversation doesn't make death come any sooner," she said. "It isn't about being morbid, it's about being prepared."
Pruden, a funeral director with more than 17 years of experience, said recent losses in her own family reinforced the need for a community event focused on education. Although she has spent years helping families after a death, she discovered firsthand how many challenges can arise when wills are outdated or family wishes have never been discussed.
She recalled losing an aunt unexpectedly and later her father, whose estate included multiple properties, vehicles and legal matters that required attention.
"I've helped families through losses for years, but I wasn't prepared for all of that," Pruden said.
Following her aunt's death, Pruden began imagining a place where people could ask questions without appointments, obligations or pressure.
"That's where the concept of ‘Dying to Know’ began," she said. "His death didn't start the idea, but it certainly reminded me why we were doing it."
Pruden emphasized that many questions families face extend beyond funeral arrangements.
"Families have questions about care, legal documents, the house, benefits and a hundred other things that don't fit neatly into a funeral arrangement," she said.
AGING AT HOME
One of the organizations represented at the event was Cornerstone Caregiving, which provides in-home care services designed to help older adults remain safely in their homes.
Morgan O'Brien, director of operations for Cornerstone Caregiving, said many families wait too long before seeking help.
"In-home care can really be tailored around what that individual needs to remain safe and comfortable at home," O'Brien explained.
Services can include personal care, meal preparation, housekeeping, transportation, medication reminders and companionship.
She noted that the need for assistance is often signaled by subtle changes rather than a single major event.
"Usually there isn't one huge sign. It's often a collection of little things," she said, citing missed medications, weight loss, hygiene concerns, increased falls and caregiver exhaustion as common warning signs.
O'Brien encouraged families not to wait for a crisis before exploring available resources.
"One of the biggest things I tell families is not to wait for a fall, hospitalization or other crisis before having the conversation," she said.
She added that accepting assistance often helps preserve independence rather than diminish it.
"The goal isn't to take over someone's life. It's to help them continue living it as safely and independently as possible."
HOSPICE CARE
Harmony Hospice community liaison Sara Stevens addressed another area often misunderstood by families.
"The biggest misconception is that hospice means giving up," Stevens said. "It doesn't. It means choosing comfort, dignity and quality of life."
She said many people mistakenly believe hospice care is only for the final days of life or only for cancer patients. In reality, hospice serves patients with a variety of diagnoses and often supports families for months.
Most hospice care occurs wherever the patient lives, whether that is at home, in assisted living or another residential setting. Stevens encouraged families to pay attention to signs such as repeated hospitalizations, weight loss, increasing dependence on others and treatments that no longer appear effective. She noted that families do not need to wait for a physician to raise the subject and can request an evaluation themselves.
Hospice services extend beyond patient care and include support for caregivers and family members through social work services, chaplain visits, respite care, education and bereavement support after a death.
"I wish people knew hospice is about living well, not just dying," Stevens said. "Learning about it early means you can make choices calmly, not in a crisis."
VETERANS BENEFITS OFTEN OVERLOOKED
Another important topic discussed at the event involved benefits available to veterans and their families.
Susan Krawchyk, executive director of the Mahoning County Veterans Service Commission, said many families are unaware of available assistance. The county offers a burial benefit for eligible veterans who were Mahoning County residents at the time of death, and veterans also may qualify for government-issued headstones or medallions.
Krawchyk stressed the importance of maintaining copies of military discharge papers, commonly known as DD Form 214s.
"Families are already dealing with the loss, and now they need to find the discharge papers," she said, encouraging veterans to ensure family members know where documents are located and to file copies with appropriate agencies.
She also noted that many families mistakenly assume benefits are available only to veterans who served in combat or during wartime.
"That's why every case is unique," she said.
STARTING THE CONVERSATION
Throughout the evening, one message remained consistent regardless of whether speakers were discussing funeral arrangements, caregiving, hospice care, veterans benefits, probate issues or pet memorialization: planning ahead can spare families significant stress during some of the most difficult moments of their lives.
Organizers said the event was never intended to focus solely on death. Instead, it was designed to encourage thoughtful preparation, informed decision-making and meaningful family conversations.
Heldreth believes that many people already have questions, but simply need permission to ask them.
"In my dozen years working in the funeral industry I know there are things we are all dying to know," she said. "We just needed a place where it was okay to ask."