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Saying these things to your kids can scar them

My Sentiments Exactly

There are lots of new parents out there.

And there are quite a few around-the-blockers like me, as well.

And sometimes, we olden folk like to leave some breadcrumbs along the trail of the parenting extravaganza for the new generation on which to nibble.

Think of them as nuggets of knowledge that come with a lifetime of learning experience.

OK, fine, I know a little bit of stuff because I’m old — and I’ve made my fair amount of mistakes, so sue me.

Actually, please don’t. I’m broke at the moment.

I digress.

Anywho, it must’ve been a bunch of geezers such as myself who penned the msn.com article entitled “12 Things Parents Say That Can Scar a Kid for Life.”

Ouch!

I’m sharing some of them as perfect examples of what NOT to do to nurture and care for your offspring.

Editor’s Note: Patty Kimerer has never uttered anything resembling any of these quotes to her beloved son. Or to any child. Ever.

• “You’re a disappointment.”

Who on earth actually says this? It’s one of the absolute worst things that could ever be uttered.

• “You’ll never amount to anything.”

This is so incredibly destructive and hurtful. Not only a confidence crusher but also a soul sucker.

• “I wish you were more like your sibling.”

Hard, hard foul on this one, people. Comparing kids to their siblings is like mixing apples and oranges. Not doable.

• “You’re so (negative adjective).”

Whatever that blank is, don’t fill it, my friends. Using negative adjectives to describe a child can be incredibly damaging to their self-esteem. Constantly hearing derogatory remarks can instill a negative self-image and inhibit their ability to develop a positive sense of self.

Parents should choose their words carefully, focusing on constructive criticism and highlighting their child’s positive attributes.

• “You’re too sensitive”

Wrong again. Invalidating a child’s emotions by labeling them as “too sensitive” can lead to emotional suppression and a lack of self-expression. It teaches them to dismiss their feelings, which can have long-term consequences on their mental health.

Instead, parents should encourage open communication, validating their children’s emotions and teaching them healthy coping mechanisms.

• “You’re a burden”

What in the heck? Again, what kind of horrendous mom or dad is saying this to the children they brought into this world? Absolutely never, capisce?

Expressing to a child that they are a burden can create feelings of guilt, shame and unworthiness. It can hinder their ability to form healthy relationships and impact their self-worth. Parents should foster an environment where children feel loved and supported, emphasizing that they are valued family members.

Do me a favor. Just give your kids support, a roof over their heads, an education and oh yeah, a crap ton of love, a’ight?

Successful parenting complete.

Kimerer is a columnist and doting Mom. Contact her with ways you spoil your kids at pkimerer@zoominternet.net.

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