We are all creatures of habit.

This I know and really, have written about on more than one occasion. It’s been approximately 943 times.

OK fine, I’m exaggerating. I’m a humor columnist though, so it’s sort of a license to “borrow ideas,” you see?

In fact, allow me to plagiarize myself and say that not only are we creatures of habit, but also that we have lots of weird habits. As a species. On the whole.

Don’t believe me? Well, I’ve come armed with plenty of graphic examples, my good peeps.

For instance, what is UP with our collective diet, yo?

I know I’m gonna catch a lot of flack for this but, man oh man, do we homosapiens eat, like, completely bizarre.

Before you go tell my editor on me, I’d like you to take the following examples, all legitimate food dishes, that I feel support my theory.

And no, I’m not going all vegan crazy on you. It’s just that certain foodstuffs hold no allure for old PK.

This I realized while watching my sister make pastitsio the other day.

Yep, that is it’s real name.

I know you’re wondering, as was I, what in the name of all that is good and right is pastitsio???

Allow me to elaborate.

First, you start with pasta. Seriously, you didn’t see that one coming? Any who, next you boil up some noodles of some type. Listen, to me, it doesn’t matter what kind because I’m not partaking in this meal whatsoever.

Before you get all judgy wudgy, give me a chance to make my case, would ya?

OK. Pastitsio. What in the actual darned heck is this recipe? It’s sort of like if mac-and-cheese married its Greek cousin and they had a little bundle of pasta, er, I mean joy.

Traditionally this stuff is known as “Cincinnati Chili.”

That makes sense, though, as I’ve always found Bengals fans to be a little bit left of center.

As my favorite Food Network (or from any other TV show, restaurant, diner, drive-in or dive) host Guy Fieri tells it:

“Although I grew up with it as ‘Farmer’s Market Spaghetti’ that my Grandmother discovered at the 1933 World’s Fair, I deemed it Weird Spaghetti as a child.” But “Good weird!” he goes on to say.

“This is a family favorite, we enjoy with just pasta and cheese. Cincinnati Chili is served with shredded cheddar, oyster crackers, chopped onion and kidney beans.”

I know what you’re thinking. Cheese, onions and kidney beans on top of pasta?

All is not right with the universe. In fact, I sense a serious disruption in the force.

This entire enigma got me to thinking, “Who decides what’s good food and what should be stored way in the back of the fridge until the end of time?”

Hmpf.

Here’s the thing. We all have such different tastes in well, taste.

For instance, you couldn’t pay me enough money in all the solar system to try that pastitsio.

Not happening. Not on my watch.

But it’s so comforting (unlike pastitsio) to know that we all have such a wide palette that one man’s pasta is another man’s stuffed hot dog special, capisce?

I apologize to all the makers and consumers of this interesting recipe, but it’s not something old PK has had any gumption to try these past 55 years.

Don’t worry though, I’ll save all the ball game hot dog toppings you can throw a stick at for you, my beloved fan base.

Both of you.

Kimerer is a columnist who is afraid of pasta that has its own earmark. Send her recipes for just about anything else to pkimerer@zoominternet.net. Bon appetit, y’all!