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Burton Cole

Dear Morning Person, please go back to bed!

My Uncle Tom was one of those annoying people who popped out of bed in the morning like a breakfast pastry from the toaster. Only instead of fruit filling, he was filled with energy and jokes, with an icing of a sunny smile and merriment in his eyes. I avoided Uncle Tom in the morning. To be ...

Prepping for winter, one Oreo at a time

This is the time of year when people get concerned about how much they’ve been feasting the last month — Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Year’s, Tuesday, etc. We’ve been packing it in and packing it on. Do not panic! There is no need to sign up for a gym membership. You weren’t going ...

New Year’s questions that gray my hair

Mark Twain once said of fellow author Rudyard Kipling, “Between us, we cover all knowledge; he knows all that can be known, and I know the rest.” There’s great wisdom in that. Like Twain, I, too, am pretty handy with things that can’t be known. Why do I focus on what can’t be known? ...

Thoughtful shopping without leaving your recliner

It’s the last weekend before Christmas, which has me thinking — I’m thinking that it’s almost time to round up a bunch of thoughtful gifts to give. The best part is I don’t even have to put on pants. I can recline here in my easy chair, tap a few keys, scroll through a few ...

When? I’ll get to it precisely at — later

What is it about detail people? If I tell you I’ll get back to you later, that’s precisely when you’ll hear back from me — later. I don’t see how I can be any more exact than that. Yet some persnickety people insist on knowing the time, down to the minute. My late wife — and ...

Remember, just keep on driving, keep on driving

I don’t mean to brag, but I drove somewhere without my GPS. And arrived where I meant to be. Without getting lost once. Seriously. This would be ho-hum news a few decades ago. Then technology began erasing our memories. Not erasing, exactly. More like replacing. When I was a teen, I ...