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Burton Cole

Rainy days and Saturdays always get me drippy thoughts

I pulled the blanket tighter around my shoulders. It was Saturday and I sat on my apartment balcony watching the rain. We’ve had so much rain. Rain and more rain. Soggy thoughts swished around my brain. I wondered, if rain falls on a town, and there’s no one to sit on a balcony to watch ...

Future colonel infiltrates Churchill Downs

It’s Kentucky Derby week, which reminds me, it’s time to get back to my plan — not to take over the world. Oh, no. I’m aiming to be crowned a Kentucky Colonel. My quest began last year when this farm boy from northeast Ohio wandered into the bluegrass wilds of Kentucky. “I’ll take ...

Shh! I’m watching the black-and-white static

I do not have TV service hooked up in my apartment. I have neither cable, dish nor streaming. Nor do I have rabbit ears wrapped in tin foil — but I have fond memories of such high-tech solutions. (Hey, fellow old-timers, remember smacking the side of the set to fix the vertical hold? Fun ...

Drink upstream of the herd, and other life lessons

Years ago, when I was in the market for life lessons, I came across a run of cowboy wisdom. The wisdom included nuggets like these: • Don’t squat with your spurs on. • Always drink upstream from the herd. • Just ’cause trouble comes visiting doesn’t mean you have to offer it a ...

What’s for supper? The cap’n says it’s glop

I enjoy cooking. I’m good at baking, boiling or browning good eats. But I came home from my last grocery shopping trip with a gallon of milk, one box of Golden Grahams and one box of Reese’s Puffs. And a tube of peel-and-eat cookie dough for dessert. That’s the thing about being a ...

Folding sheets with no one fit for blame

The epiphany splatted me upside the head at the laundromat. (Being splatted by an epiphany is something like being socked by a fit, but without the frustration of being swamped by a fitted sheet.) I had just flipped open the washing machine lid to discover “snow” splattered throughout ...