Published July 30, 2006
How often have you heard the saying:"time is money..."? Ever wonder what that means? Oh yeah, I know-ya can't make money sitting on your backside doing nothing else. But time in and of itself is certainly NOT money-ok, then what is time and how do we value it?
I remember a guest-a doctor, tell me a number of years ago: "Louie, I've been around a lot of people dying-I've been in many hospital wards where people we actually on their death beds. I've never been told that people wished they had made more money. I never heard ANYONE say that they should have spent more time at the office,at work, at the business. What I DID hear was people telling me that they should have spent more time with their wives,kids,families,loved ones,etc..." So IOW(remember?-In Other Words), they told this doctor while on their death beds-when they were close to death that THEY HAD WISHED THAT DURING THEIR LIVES-THEY HAD LOVED MORE !
So why don't we Love more ?
1) Are we afraid ?--of WHAT ? Rejection ?
~Maybe we fear loving and being loved because real Love (whatever THAT means) has been elusive to us. Many have Loved and not felt that the reciprocal Love as equal to what was given. Many say the word "LOVE" and mean something else such as "comfort".
I LOVE YOU means : *I am COMFORTABLE w/You*
So, does comfort=LOVE ? -NO . My Crocs (shoes) are COMFORTABLE--ok, ok, most Croc wearers will say that they LOVE their Crocs, but they don't mean that they ONLY LOVE THAT particular pair-but enjoy the comfort,fit,colour and would feel the same way about any OTHER pair of Crocs-especially of the same colour ! Back to the question,Are we afraid of Loving due to the possibility of rejection ? Huh-uh! Rejection is NOT LOVING but the fear of Love NOT RETURNED -not the act of GIVING LOVE.
2) Does the level of risk = the possible level of reward ?Gee, that's an easy one. You can't be talking unconditional Love even pseudo-unconditional Love re: THIS one. The mere mention of REWARD is condition ! When we risk in friendship or Love the reward's worth the risk -PERIOD. Look: what do you lose if you lose ? IOW(remember now-I'm NOT going to keep explaining: IOW=in other words). Yes, we risk feeling friendly to/with someone or Loving someone on an unbalanced scale: " I Love you more than you love me "-really ? As above, the concern here is what's returned, not what's given. If friendship and /or Love are given. The risks here are NEVER = to the rewards(possible rewards) [ok, here it comes:] ** The rewards are ALWAYS greater than the risk in friendships/Loveships !** The only risk is that your outreach or reaching out may not be returned-ok, have a bit of a cry and move on...AH, but when returned-!-!-!-!!!!- let me explain it this way:
If I throw a boom-er-rang out and it doesn't come back-no big deal-I gather it up and try again, maybe in a different direction,pitch,style or just a different place **BUT**, if i throw the 'rang and it RETURNS, comes BACKto me, - NOW I've REALLY got something/done something !
3) Don't those that Love ultimately end up hurting terribly? YES,in the sense of couples, one will hurt terribly when losing the other Loved one BUT the LOVE remains. This is like above, the REWARD, the years of Loving - truly priceless AND the ultimate loss forever painful, but the pain of a lonely life, a life w/o Love is unfathomable to me.
I visit an area "nursing home " on a regular basis. Unfortunately many of the residents receive no visitors. Widows and widowers left alone to die. I wonder what they'll tell me when I ask them if and if so -how they would have loved differently and that TIME may be interpreted as a lot of things-certainly NOT money !
end part V- The Unanswered Knock of Love
c. b.Free Radio,Ltd
13 July 06 11:49 pm
yeah,yeah- part VI 's is in the works.......