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All the carping about the carp is fishy



Published: Fri, January 25, 2013 @ 12:00 a.m.

By David Skolnick (Contact)


On the side

Active Republican: Tracey Winbush of Youngstown had a productive week. The Mahoning County Republican Party’s executive committee nominated her to replace Clarence Smith on the county board of elections. Ohio Secretary of State Jon Husted makes that final decision. Winbush was also elected to serve as assistant treasurer of the Ohio Republican Party.

Food fight: A fundraiser by the Mahoning County Democratic Party could turn competitive. Called “Cooking with the Commissioners,” Anthony Traficanti, Carol Rimedio-Righetti and David Ditzler along with Mark Canzonetta, a master chef, will cook at the Culinary Arts Center at 492 McClurg Road from 6 to 9 p.m. Tuesday. Tickets are $130 per person with seating for up to 80. Among the commissioners, the one whose meal is judged to be the best will have $500 donated to the charity of his or her choice by the party.

While this newspaper’s editorials have long supported efforts to keep Asian carp out of the Great Lakes, I’ve got to be honest — I haven’t paid much attention to it.

I don’t know why, but when I received an email from U.S. Sen. Sherrod Brown’s office that he was having a teleconference call on Wednesday with reporters about a proposed Strategic Response to Asian Carp Invasion Act to keep the fish out of the Ohio River basin, I became interested. I was more animated than usual in the office wondering why we’re picking on a fish species.

Asian carp are super-fish that spend every waking moment eating and populating, overwhelming American fish who can’t keep up with the foreigners. When Asian carp hear the sound of boat motors, they literally get jumpy. These fish, that can weigh 100 pounds, leap out of the water — which is pretty cool to see and there are dozens of videos online — and have been known to smack boaters upside their heads.

These are fish with attitudes, and wherever they are, they take over. That impacts the ecosystem and the fishing industry.

This isn’t the Asian carp’s fault. They didn’t ask to come to America. Yeah, they’re fish and even if they were asked, they weren’t going to answer.

Asian carp were brought to the United States in the 1970s by Southern fish farmers as bottom-feeders to clean up ponds. They kept eating and populating and are now in major bodies of water.

Brown and others want to keep them out of the Great Lakes and the Ohio River basin.

Sometimes on these conference calls, I get a little goofy. OK, goofier than usual.

While it’s beneficial to have Brown and other politicians provide reporters with time on these teleconference calls, they typically aren’t that interesting so I’ve been known to try to spice them up when the mood strikes me.

I had a running joke last year with Brown’s press office about their terrible taste in music. Specifically, they really like Phil Collins.

I told them I was going to ask Brown about his favorite Collins’ song on one of the calls. I don’t think they believed me. When I asked, Brown couldn’t give an answer, which led to a lot of laughs from the three people who were in on the joke.

With Brown taking about a potential Asian carp “invasion” on Wednesday’s call, I decided to have a little fun.

As Tom Jackson of the Sandusky Register wrote in a funny blog post about what happened, “the questioning took a turn for the bizarre when the senator was asked to diagnose a reporter’s sanity and defend his hostility to the fish.”

I said: “It sounds like we’re persecuting Asian carp for just being more aggressive than other fish. Am I insane?”

Brown was polite enough to say about my sanity that he couldn’t “answer that clinically. It’s not my expertise.”

He talked about “controlling” Asian carp. I asked: “So you want to kill them?”

“I don’t advocate on these calls killing anybody or anything,” Brown answered. “No, we want to control them so they don’t come in.”

Still sounds like fishocide to me. But anti-Asian carpites, please no angry calls, emails, comments or tweets. I’m only kidding.


Comments

1nojimbo(223 comments)posted 1 year, 6 months ago

A new low in Youngstown "journalism" history. Worse than the childish parade columns. Even below the whiny "I had to wait in a hot room for a long time" columns. Seriously, get an eight grader to talk about politics. Or better yet, switch Joe Scalzo over to this beat from sports. He's easily the best writer at the paper and while I love sports, the political beat is too important to leave in its current hands.

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2One_Who_Stayed(236 comments)posted 1 year, 6 months ago

I agree.
While politics is important, we need to get "over ourselves" every now-and then and have a laugh as well.

I especially liked the part about American Carp being able to compete with any Carp in the world - they just want a level playing field.

Nice job Dave.

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3scalzo(8 comments)posted 1 year, 6 months ago

I don't think we should allow a writer with a Neil Diamond poster at his cubicle to insult anyone's musical tastes.

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4DavidSkolnick(49 comments)posted 1 year, 6 months ago

That from a guy who blasts Jars of Clay on his headphones.

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5gdog4766(1462 comments)posted 1 year, 6 months ago

Young scribe be careful where you tread. Those of us with the carp confederacy take great umbrage with those who take our plight lightly. For years we have had to endure governments attempts to limit our reach. We shall not go,quietly into the night. Remember we are everywhere, lakes, ponds your local Walmart. And next when your young child is lucky enough to get that ping pong ball to land in that bowl, you just might be taking one of our operatives home with you. We are everywhere (at least where there is water). Consider yourself put on notice by the carp confederacy!

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6DavidSkolnick(49 comments)posted 1 year, 6 months ago

Gdog - Absolutely hysterical and extremely clever! Thanks for the warning.

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7scalzo(8 comments)posted 1 year, 6 months ago

See, I'm surprised you don't like Jars of Clay, Dave. They're your kind of band -- decades past their prime.

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