Son's pal needs to back off
Dear Annie: My 22-year-old son's best friend, "Jeremy," has evidently taken a liking to my wife. He approached her once with an offer to be intimate. At that time, we both laughed it off. Then he decided to send her a text message in the wee hours of the morning, when he might possibly have been drunk. When I asked him about it, he said he wanted to get in touch with me but didn't have my number.
Some time passed and nothing else happened until last night. Jeremy called at 3 a.m. He was definitely drunk this time. My wife kindly told him to go to bed, but he didn't give up. He phoned three or four more times, and each time my wife told him nicely to sleep it off. We finally had to turn the phone off so we could get some rest. His last call was at 4:25 a.m.
I trust my wife and had complete confidence in her handling the situation at first, but now I don't know what to do. She says he probably won't remember the calls, and if he does, he'll be horribly embarrassed by the whole thing. I don't think it's that innocent.
I am torn. Jeremy is my son's best friend, and they have big dreams with their band. I don't want to hurt anyone, but I also don't want a strain on my marriage. This boy has been part of our family for almost eight years. Now he is apparently a young man with rather adventurous ideas. What do I do? Mrs. Robinson's Husband
Dear Mr. Robinson: Jeremy is smitten with your wife, but if you trust her, it won't go any further. Since he is your son's best friend, it would be best if she could disabuse him of his romantic notions in a gentle manner, allowing him to get over her without causing any permanent damage. Should the drunken rants increase, or if Jeremy attempts anything more, then it will be time for the two of you to sit down with him (when he's sober) and tell him this has to stop.
Dear Annie: A friend stayed at my place because her apartment was being fumigated the day before Thanksgiving. After I told my friend she could stay with me, I was invited to my sister-in-law's for our family dinner. I then asked if my friend could come if I brought along a dish. I didn't want her left alone. I didn't say anything to my friend until I was sure it would be OK with my family.
My sister-in-law left me a screaming message that what I did was wrong. She told me I simply should have said I couldn't come and it was rude to ask to bring a guest. I didn't know that asking first was bad. What do you think? Etiquette Faux Pas
Dear Etiquette: You did nothing wrong. When you have an unexpected houseguest and you are invited to a family event, it is good manners to ask if the guest would be welcome, and if not, to decline the invitation. The fact that this was a family Thanksgiving dinner means your friend should definitely have been included, knowing that she would otherwise be alone on a holiday. Shame on your sister-in-law for being so mean-spirited.
Dear Annie: Thanks for the nifty tips about deterring pesky cats. I understood the ground orange peels just fine and assumed the food coloring was to tip off the owner, since the cat would turn blue or red, as well as be wet. However, I am puzzled about one tip. Just how does one collect coyote urine, and is it really worth the trouble? Won't it annoy the coyote? Just Wondering in Columbia, Mo.
Dear Smartypants: Urine is collected humanely from animals in game farms, zoos and preserves via floor collection drains. It's also available on the Internet. But thanks ever so much for asking.
Annie's Snippet: Potential powers of creativity are within us, and we have a duty to work assiduously to discover these powers. Martin Luther King Jr.
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