She's seeing 'Jim,' but not in the nude
Dear Annie: I worked with "Jim" for two years, and we became great friends. We didn't date due to our close working relationship. However, Jim changed jobs, and at the time, neither of us was in a relationship, so we started seeing each other.
In every respect but one, Jim is the man I want to spend the rest of my life with. Unfortunately, the one thing has to do with our sex life. Jim refuses to undress completely. I have been in a few intimate relationships, and we would usually get totally naked during sex, and we always slept naked. However, even though Jim can be very romantic and a good lover, his refusal to become completely naked or sleep in the nude is a major issue for me.
I have asked him to explain this, and he can't. He is not even comfortable with me being naked, although he tolerates it. I know relationships are about compromise, but I can't think of a way to meet him halfway. Either he stays partially clothed during sex or I end the relationship. Neither option is appealing. Do you have any suggestions? Wants To Be Nude
Dear Wants To Be Nude: Jim apparently has some embarrassment or aversion toward bare skin. He can talk to a therapist and work on that, but it doesn't have to be a make-or-break issue for you. If Jim's only flaw is that he makes love with his undershirt and socks on, who cares? He sounds like a great guy, and you'd be foolish to let him slip away because you want to gaze longingly at his pecs. Or wherever.
Dear Annie: All Americans know that the U.S. health-care system is troubled. The rising cost of health care, the growing number of uninsured, the strains on local hospitals and the lack of primary-care specialists have been well documented. More and more, we're hearing that patients are finding themselves unable to see their family doctor when they need to.
On behalf of our patients, we are asking that the next elected U.S. Congress be "the health-care Congress."
That is why thousands of family physicians from across the country recently joined together at a rally in Washington, D.C. At the rally, my colleagues and I demanded that candidates running for office from either party commit to fixing our system before it is too late.
Annie, there is something your readers can do to help. Please let them know about the Guide to Health Issues for Voters available online at www.familydoctor.org. This easy-to-use guide provides nonpartisan information about the top health issues facing our country and questions voters can pose to candidates.
We all must get involved to ensure that Americans have access to quality health care for generations to come. Larry S. Fields, M.D., Fellow and President, American Academy of Family Physicians
Dear Dr. Fields: Thank you for showing our readers how to become involved in the future decisions of their health care. We hope they will look for your brochure.
Dear Annie: My wife had an affair with her best friend's husband. How did I find out? Her friend alerted me. I had no clue. I trusted her. Through her best friend's diligent, exhaustive, extensive investigating, they were caught. The friend discovered their regular meeting place and arranged for a waitress to get a photo of the two of them lovingly holding hands across the table. The friend also managed to find an incriminating e-mail and two messages on her husband's cell phone.
Annie, I don't want advice. My marriage has ended. To all of you hubbies out there, don't be a naive ostrich. There are signs. Be aware and alert. D.G.
Dear D.G.: Thanks for the warning. Your ex-wife's friend sounds like she should be with the FBI.
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